How To Help Children Move From Gratitude To Kindness At Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving may be celebrated at different times and in slightly different ways in Canada and the United States, but there's something we share. It's a time to pause, spend time with family and friends, and focus on the things we are thankful for.

In Canada, Thanksgiving comes in October, while our friends in the United States celebrate in November. The history behind the two celebrations is different, too. But regardless of where we live, I think Thanksgiving gives us a wonderful opportunity to talk with children about gratitude. And I don't think those conversations have to stop with the big things.

When we ask children what they are thankful for, we often hear the expected answers: family, friends, pets, toys, their home. Those are certainly things worth appreciating. But what about the little things?
What made you smile today?
Who helped you when something was difficult?
Did someone invite you to play?
Did you learn something you couldn't do before?
Was there a moment when someone was kind to you?

Sometimes the little things are important

Sometimes the little things can make a difficult day a little better. I think this message is especially important for children. Being thankful doesn't mean that everything is going perfectly. We all have difficult days, and children do, too. They may be having trouble with a friend, struggling with their schoolwork, missing someone, or simply feeling like nothing is going their way.

We can't make those difficult things disappear by telling children to be thankful. But we can help them notice that the difficult thing isn't the only thing happening. Maybe a friend made them laugh. Someone helped them. A favorite book was waiting for them. They had a chance to play outside. They accomplished something they didn't think they could do.

From noticing to doing

Learning to notice those little things can help children develop an attitude of gratitude and sometimes a little hope, too.

​I've always liked using Thanksgiving as a springboard for acts of kindness in my classroom. Once children begin noticing the kindness of others, it is a natural step to ask, "What can you do to make someone else's day a little better?"

It doesn't have to be anything complicated. Maybe it's inviting someone to join a game at recess, helping someone pick up their things, saying thank you to someone who helped them, leaving a little note for a friend, or sitting beside someone who seems lonely. These are little things, but children quickly learn that little things can make a big difference.

This is also where I like to introduce the idea of paying it forward. Someone has done something kind for you. Instead of simply saying thank you, you can pass that kindness along to someone else. That person might then do something kind for someone else. And before you know it, one little act of kindness has become many.

Kindness explosion

I have used my Kindness Explosion: Paying It Forward poster to help children visualize this idea. It demonstrates that what starts with one small act can spread much farther than we might expect.

You can easily work this into the Thanksgiving activities you already have planned. If children are writing about what they are thankful for, perhaps encourage them to include small things that made them smile. If you are reading a Thanksgiving story, stop and talk about the kindness you see in the story. Who helped someone? How did it make that person feel? You might even have children write a thank-you note or draw a picture for someone who has done something kind for them. The activity itself doesn't have to be elaborate. The important part is helping children connect receiving and giving kindness.

Let the kindness continue

I like starting this conversation at Thanksgiving because it doesn't have to end when Thanksgiving is over. As Christmas approaches, the focus is often on what we want to receive. That's part of the fun of Christmas, especially for children! But by starting with gratitude in the fall, we can also begin talking about what we can give to others that doesn't come wrapped in a box.
A smile, a kind word, a helping hand, a thank-you, or a little encouragement for someone who is having a difficult day.

This is where my RACK: Random Acts of Christmas Kindness resource comes in. I  created it to encourage children to look for ways to spread kindness during the Christmas season. And perhaps starting early is part of the fun.

We can look for opportunities to be kind at Thanksgiving; we don't have to wait until December to get started. We can get those little acts of kindness happening early, and by the time Christmas arrives, the kindness explosion may be much bigger!

​You might notice kindness happening around the classroom, on the playground, or throughout the school. And once children start looking for kindness, they often begin finding more opportunities to be kind themselves.

A simple lesson with a lasting message

I don't think we need to replace the Thanksgiving crafts, stories, writing activities, and other traditions we enjoy doing with children. They help make the season special. Instead, we can use those activities as a starting point for a bigger conversation. I have several Fall/Thanksgiving resources available that would be great to include.

Thanksgiving gives us a chance to help children notice what is good in their lives, to appreciate the big things and the little things, to recognize the kindness of others, and to think about how they can pass that kindness along.

Because gratitude isn't just about saying, "I'm thankful for what I have." It can also lead us to say, "I'm thankful someone was kind to me. Now, what can I do to be kind to someone else?" And perhaps that little act of kindness will lead to another, and another.

That's how kindness grows. And that is a lesson worth carrying from Thanksgiving right through Christmas and into the rest of the year.

Related Posts